Thoughts from Sabbatical - Note 12 from john (8/16)
Submitted by john on Sat, 08/16/2008 - 19:21.
"Home is the place where, when you have to go there,
they have to take you in.”
Robert Frost, The Death of the Hired Man
they have to take you in.”
Robert Frost, The Death of the Hired Man
I have always had a difficult time with the question – “where are you from – where’s home?” I was born in Denver, Colorado but only lived there till I was 2. I moved to San Antonio, Texas and lived there for 3 years and then I moved to Harlingen, Texas (near South Padre Island) and lived there till I was 18. I use to say I was from Texas but when I turned 30 I started asking the question, “How long do you have to be from some place before it is where you are from”? More to the point – where is “home”?
I have lived in Missouri now for 10 years. My youngest son was born here and my oldest son moved here when he was one year old. All they know is Missouri as “home”? Today I met a lady from the Azores. These are tiny little islands in the Atlantic way off the coast of Portugal. She and her husband are missionaries there and of course I asked here “where are you from – where’s home?” She said, “Portugal”. Then she asked, “Where are you from?” I hesitated, and then carefully said, “I live in America - St. Louis, Missouri.” It started me thinking about “home” and a wonderful and powerful thought came into my heart – St. Louis IS home. Well, to be exact St. Charles County is home but you get the point. Everything within me welled up with pride and I told the lady – “yep, St. Louis is my home!”
I leave for “home” tomorrow morning. It will take me two days, three trains, a taxi cab, a shuttle bus, and an airplane to get “home” – but I will be “home” Monday night. I know it sounds like “Planes, Trains, and Automobiles”, but I don’t care how I get there, I’m ready to be “home”.
This has been a remarkable journey and again I want to say to you the body of Christ known as the Summit – thank you! What a gift of time, rest, soul searching, and most importantly – connecting with the heart of my Savior. I have seen more than my eyes ever imagined they would see of this part of the world. I have truly beheld the greatness of our Creator and the creativity of His creation. I have met people form all over the world and have left my blood and sweat all over Europe. Here at Kilchzimmer alone, the CEF Headquarters of Europe, I have met people from 22 different countries. It truly has been a small picture of what heaven will be like as people from every tribe, tongue, and nation gather at the throne of Jesus Christ. I have filled up a journal, read several great books, devoured some great Scripture, and spent a lot of hours talking and trying to listen to God. (I don’t prayer or listen well during prayer, but I’m learning.) In the middle of all this, I believe God has written a few things on my heart as He has been in the midst of breaking it over the last 11 weeks. (The last blog goes into this in some detail so go back to #11 and read it if you are curious as to what I am speaking of.) However, trying to some up for anyone what happened on this journey in my heart will be beyond difficult. I feel like I have read a 1,500 page novel that has twenty plot twists and has deeply engaged my head and heart. I now have to try and summarize it in two minutes of a conversation. Please, bear with me when I return. What happened that matters will be shared over time and I promise I will not bore you with home videos or slides of my trip. What God has etched on my heart – you will hear and more importantly – I hope you will see.
“Home” – Robert Frost said – “is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.” I am hoping this is true. I miss my family and I’m ready to see my wife and my boys. I have only been away from them for 17 days but it feels like 3 months. I am hoping they will take me in. I also miss my bed, my dog, and my bathroom and probably not in that order. And, I miss the body of The Summit and what God has been doing there these last three months. This was a good time and a much needed time for my heart and my body. But, I want you to hear this again – “I miss The Summit”. I miss so many things but what I can say to sum it all up is – I miss “home”. See ya soon - (August 31st to be exact)!
In the midst of being broken
and ready to come home
john

